Category Archives: twitter

Sunday Funnies

It’s hotter than a three dollar pistol out west, but laughter will make it better…for people who live out east.

Just saying,

Mittster

http://www.mittwinsteadauthor.com

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Sunday Funnies

Smile and be happy…for tomorrow we work!

Just saying,

Mittster

https://mittwinstead.wixsite.com/mitt-winstead-author

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Sunday Funnies

Today’s Sunday Funnies is to cheer up all our Facebook friends still in the grips of winter. I lived nine years in Michigan, so I truly feel your pain. There is one bright spot…while I am suffering 110 degree and 10% humidity days this summer, you will be basking in 90 degree with 90% humidity days. Man, you folks just can’t seem to catch a break!

Just saying,

Mittster

https://mittwinstead.wixsite.com/mitt-winstead-author

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Sunday Funnies

I hope everyone has a wonderful Sunday and that perhaps by chance some of these cartoons posted by Facebookers make you get your laugh on.

Just saying,

Mittster

http://www.murdermysteryevilinthemirror.com/

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

God Bless Bloggers

Here is the real deal about blogs. They are what you might call freelance writing exercises that don’t have to be super intelligent, witty, humorous, or even have any social redeeming value. Blogs are just thoughts written down on a free format for fun.

I do admit that sometimes my blogs get serious, sometimes witty and sometimes even funny, but always real. I don’t generally use fiction, but I do use poetic license occasionally to make the blogs more interesting than they have a right to be.

Knowing I can’t possibly please everyone lets me be myself with few exceptions. This process is made possible by the fact that they are my blogs and thus are protected by copy write laws. I also take responsibility for my blog’s content; if I have offended anyone – please feel free to not read them anymore rather than complain because, in the final analysis, I really don’t give a rat’s ass what anyone thinks about my blogs or me for that matter.

With that being said, for those of you who enjoy the blogs…they are indeed written for you and you alone. The rest can go to wherever assholes go and cause hate and discontent there. Some people are without regard to the effort it takes to publish anything in today’s world. I will continue to write until I drop dead from the irritation I feel from those who don’t, and can’t, write anything anyone would ever be interested in.

Jealousy is a bad thing, I fear, if applied in large doses. I am jealous of Nancy Bradley (R.I.P.) http://www.nancybradley.org/ because she was a bestselling author and I am not, but I loved and respected her because I know how hard she had worked to get where she was in the game of life. I do not need to belittle anyone because of their success; instead, I shout praise from the rooftops because I am lucky enough to know authors who are successful.  Besides, how do we rate success anyway? I equate success with anyone who has the moxie to try, fail, pick themselves up and try again and again until they achieve their goals!

I am proud to be an author and wherever writing leads me is where I am committed to go. If it be straight to hell…so be it! I doubt it though; writers use brains instead of brawn and we are a loving and caring bunch of eccentric misfits. So the next time someone wants to berate this author, remember this…you could be next in one of my murder mysteries.

Write on,

Mittster

http://www.murdermysteryevilinthemirror.com/

Get Simplistic

I see have seen people on the Internet professing to know the secret of how to be an author using certain secret steps to make it happen for only $19.95. What a joke, and people go for that crap to boot. There are no magic writings or secret potions to being an author. You need only one thing – desire!

Yup, that’s it, folks. Desire is the magic formula to becoming an author and it doesn’t cost a dime. Not all educated people can become good authors and some uneducated people have become super authors with best sellers running out their keyboards or pencils. (Warning: Writing novels can be addicting.)

The question I hear most is…where do I start? This is where simplicity comes in to play. Start with the end in mind. You have an idea for a book or you would not be reading this blog. Sit down at the keyboard or with pen and paper and write a sentence pertaining to your book idea. When you finish your sentence, look at it and make sure it makes sense to you and in some way represents your idea. Example: I was walking in the park and discovered a dead body. This simple sentence is the start of a great murder mystery. It sets the tone for the novel and everyone and their mother knows what the genre is going to be.

The second step is just as easy – write a second sentence. This sentence should enhance the first. Example: I screamed and vomited all over a jogger who was passing by. Gross, but murder is a nasty business. Walla, you now have two sentences of your new murder mystery.

The next steps are just as easy. Keep writing until you have a paragraph; then keep on trucking until you have a chapter. When you finish your chapter, stop writing and review what you have written. If it excites you and you can’t wait to continue, your demons will be gone and you will be hooked on the greatest adventure of a lifetime. If you fell asleep while writing, perhaps you should stay with your day job. The chapter you have just written will test your desire. Remember that desire is the only tool you really need – along with imagination.

We all have imagination; it’s what makes humans tick. Write your novel with pride and enthusiasm. I would prefer you do not pick the murder mystery genre – I don’t need the competition.

I’m just saying,

Mittster

http://www.murdermysteryevilinthemirror.com/