I sure would like to be a super hero, maybe a combination of Superman, Batman and The Shadow. Some younger folks may not remember The Shadow, but he was a crime fighter on the radio way back in the day.
I think one of the first things I would do as a super hero is fly to Iran and snatch Mahmoud Ahmadinejad by the hair and whisk him to Mars for an extended stay. Then I would do the same thing to Kim Jong-un Jr. of North Korea, but he would go to Pluto; we can’t keep these tyrants too close together. I would also grab Vladimir Vladimirovich Putin of Russia; he can live on Jupiter for the duration.
I would transport every terrorist in the world to Venus…after all she is the Goddess of love; maybe they can find their virgins there. Oh, let’s not forget Hu Jintao, the leader of communist China. Perhaps he would find Mercury to his liking; it’s going to be very hot where he is heading after he dies anyway.
Once this is done, I need to clean up the good old U.S.A. Let me see, who shall I start with…wait a minute, hold the phone – Congressmen and women are leaving the Capitol and heading for parts unknown. I guess they heard I was coming for them next.
My work here is done. Maybe now we can get down to some serious governing “Of the people, by the people and for the people, one nation, under God, with liberty and justice for all?”