“My morals haven’t changed – just my ability to be immoral has.”
After writing the above quote, I realized it has a deeper meaning than meets the eye. Last night I was dreaming about my younger days and the crazy stuff I used to do for kicks. You know, like drinking, taking drugs and being a rounder with little or no regard for the feelings of others – especially women. In my dream, I was trying to remember when it was that my life started to turn around and head toward consideration and a deep respect for people, especially women.
It had to be earlier than when I discovered it wasn’t all about me. That enlightenment was relatively recent. I was disappointed at first until I really understood that it wasn’t all about me and that we human beings are all in this life together. If we don’t soon understand this fact, our species will go extinct like so many before us after four billion years of evolution on this planet.
No, I think the 180 degree turn started when I gave up smoking, drugs and booze in 1990. Now, that’s not to say I haven’t had a few minor relapses since, but just the feeling of independence from dependency was enough to get me back on the right track. When I quit abusing my body and brain, it became evident that I needed to re-invent myself. Without the use of mind-altering substances, I found my mind was like a sponge – soaking up new and exciting behaviors that were fun and not self destructive.
Low and behold I found a whole world of people who had exciting and fulfilling lives without the need to “get high” on anything but life itself. I need to mention that in 1995 I married a woman who did not drink, smoke or do drugs and she was, and still is, the most exciting human being I have ever known. Needless to say had I not managed to get a grip on my own life, meeting her would have been impossible.
I do remember when I was steeped in booze the last thing I wanted to do was read some boring blog from a dufus living in Arizona preaching some holier than thou attitude about how great life is. I can relate to that attitude and I suspect those people are not reading this blog anyway. I would prefer to leave the reading to people who are able to see the page in any case.
For those of you who are leaning with one elbow on the bar downing a shot of tequila and chasing it with a draft, maybe someday soon you will be also making that 180 degree turn in your life and stumble upon this blog or some other writings that will help you make the decision to find a better way of living. Meanwhile, drink on buds and budettes; I feel your pain, especially the next morning – providing you have a next morning!
The dream ended with me waking up with my wife and two dogs sleeping humpy-jawed all over our king sized bed and me thinking about the fantastic Harley ride I am going to make over Labor Day to Colorado. Yes, I will stop at restaurants that serve booze, but the only thing I am going to drink is iced tea and water. Life is good….