Last First Date


21 years ago, I went on my last first date. The week had started out OK, but it suddenly turned really bright when I received a telephone message that there was a lady who wanted to meet me from the dating service I belonged to.

I was getting a divorce, lonely as hell, and I thought maybe the service could find me someone to date. I had dreams of going out to dinner, dancing and maybe even meeting someone I could get to know as a steady girlfriend.

The date was set for the following Saturday night and I was so excited. Dinner reservations were made at Red Lobster in Saginaw, Michigan, which was a short drive from Midland where we both lived. There would be rock and roll dancing afterward at a club. The stage was set and I wanted everything to be perfect.

I drove to her house and found myself in the driveway of the quaintest house I had ever seen. Although I drove past her house everyday for months, I had never really noticed just how beautiful it was. It struck me odd that I only lived a few blocks away, but light years from the people I was to meet inside.

After taking a deep breath, I headed for the door bell and pushed it with great trepidation. The woman who answered the door was a vision of beauty and grace. I was stunned while gazing, mouth agape, at the tall, slender and absolutely gorgeous woman before me. There had to be a mistake. Am I at the wrong address? Fortunately for me, it was not a mistake and I was invited in to meet her officially and her two sons.

The boys were polite, well-groomed and I liked them right off. The youngest, in his late teens looked like his mother and the oldest, in his early twenties, did not have his mother’s blond hair, but instead had dark hair and I assumed he looked like his father – which was the case. Both guys were handsome young men and a delight to be around. She did have two Chihuahuas that were not as friendly, but cute little rascals never-the-less. That is another story….

After getting to know all three a little better, we finally decided it was time to go on our first (and I hoped not our last) date. We headed for Saginaw talking and learning more about each other. I remember I was so enamored by her beauty and she had the most fantastic hands. Her fingers were long, sensuous and so expressive. I would be amiss if I didn’t mention the fact that she had the body of Venus and I tried so hard not to stare and slobber on myself like the idiot that men can be.

Dinner was good and I learned that she did not drink or smoke which was fine with me. I was anxious to go dancing so I could hold this woman in my arms while slow dancing to music, any music would do – just let me hold her! We danced to a slow tune and then started dancing to some lively rock and roll. I started to rock out and proceeded to twirl her around several times. I lost my balance and grabbed her breast halfway through a twirl and ended with grabbing her butt, just before she yelled at me, “What are you doing?”

I was mortified and starting apologizing profusely, while totally understanding I had just committed the first deadly sin of the first date…it was all over but the crying now. We went back to our table, which had it been any bigger I would have gladly hidden under rather than face her wrath. While she could clearly see that I was horrified and started laughing about the incident, all I wanted to do was somehow disappeared like a wisp of smoke.

I told her it would be better if we left now in spite of her insistence that everything was fine and we should stay. I could not face her beautiful face and smile while I was dying inside knowing I was destined to live a solitary life of shame and humiliation – to say nothing of the wrath of her two sons who would surely want revenge.

I took her home and retreated to my place in total shock with the knowledge that I had just met and lost an angel all in one fell swoop. Way to go jackass! Sleep came hard and my dreams were of lost love and being whipped on by two young men defending their mother’s honor.

Early Sunday evening I was jolted from a sound sleep by the ringing of my phone. Oh, my God, it was her! She asked if I would mind looking at a house her oldest wanted to buy. He didn’t want to purchase it without an inspection and she knew I was in construction. I asked when she would like me to see it. “How about now?” was her reply.

I threw on some clothes, brushed my teeth, combed my hair, and was waiting in the yard for her and her son when they pulled in five minutes after her call. After the inspection, while her son was in the house talking to the real estate salesman, I found myself sitting alone with my dream girl in the truck. I again apologized in earnest and she just smiled and then to my utter amazement, kissed me full on the mouth. She pulled back and said with the most wonderful tone in her voice, “Don’t worry, this will be something we can kid you about for many years to come.”

My wife and I have been together ever since and she is still my angel and I have come to love her sons as my own. As for the two Chihuahuas, they have passed, but not before they taught me how to love dogs as our children. I was, and still am, the luckiest man on the planet!

Write on,



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